"Hi, Anna Kate!"

Last week, when I felt normal - we went over to Jeremy and Crystal's house and had dinner.  Jackson had so much fun playing with Anna... He loves saying her name.  Pretty adorable.  

Thanks for dinner Jeremy and Crystal!

What a beauty!

 It's probably good that I only have boys.  This was my lame attempt at putting Anna's hair up.

Ick.

I got up this morning feeling much worse than I've felt so far.  It doesn't help that Jackson was up screaming all night ("Daddy, daddy!!!  It's wake up time!  I need tucked in!  I need lemonade!  I need to go pee pee!!!!!").... but I woke up feeling like I just spent the night in the clothes dryer on tumble.  My head was especially bad and my cough was so deep and annoying.  I made an appt w/ the doc - who is also a friend of ours.  I was blessed for him to see me on such short notice.  He was very helpful.  He thinks I have bronchitis, like Jackson.  In addition, I probably have a bad sinus infection.  He prescribed me an antibiotic, inhaler and flonase.  He also told me to start taking Claritin on a regular basis, put a humidifier in my room and get some sleep.  Ryan came home early from work and let me sleep a few hours.  Then, at 530p, he took off to New Jersey for an interview (for a position locally).  My mom was kind enough to come stay the night w/ me tonight and help me w/ the kids.  I am so anxious to feel better.

Boooooooooooooooooo.

Yesterday wasn't the best day for us... Started feeling pretty crummy last night - been coughing for weeks.  And J started coughing while we were in Branson... Last night, J felt like he had a fever, so I kept him home from Mothers Day Out so as to not expose any kids in case he was contagious.  I just felt so so crappy but mustered up the energy to get myself dressed, the boys dressed, breakfast, etc and headed to drop off ethan at school while Jackson and I went to my endocrinologist appt.  He was a champ at the doc office.  I had downloaded some apps on my "purple phone" which is what he calls it (my ipod touch) and he was very entertained.  Finally doc comes in and informs me that not only is my TSH perfect (0.79), but my cholesterol is also perfection.  It was 215 - which he said a "uninformed" doctor would say is high but he said my "good" cholesterol is off-the-charts high (79 I think?) and he said that you can't "buy that kind of number" -so I felt good about that!  He said cholesterol is hereditary so the chance of me having high cholesterol in my future is pretty slim... so that's a big relief! He said the only thing that didn't look good on paper is my weight - duh.  I knew that.  We talked about my exercise and diet.  He said the only thing he wants me to change is to add 5 fruits/veggies every single day at a minimum.  No grapes or bananas, but everything else is free game.  Preferably 3 veggies and 2 half cup servings of fruit.  So I'm in.  I'll try that and see what happens.  I am disgusted with how long it's taking me to get this weight off, so I am willing to try anything short of starving myself at this point.  Anyway, he checked me and said since I've had my cough for so long, he thinks the best thing to make it better is sleep.  HA!  He gave me some cough syrup that he said would knock me out.  We left there and went and picked up Ethan and went to our appointment at the pediatrician's office.   I asked for them to check Ethan's ears again while we were already going... So the doc checked Ethan and he's still not infected, so that's so great!  He still has fluid behind there but not infected - even though his ear tugging is out of control!  He is cutting 5 teeth up top right now though and one of them just broke through this weekend, so he now has 3 teeth!  The other 4 are sooooooo swollen! Oh, and he weighs 19 pounds, 5 oz... at 8 Months old!!  O-M-G!!! As far as Jackson (his weight was 29 pounds, 7 oz) - his ears were perfect but his throat was badly red and doc said he sounds really raspy so he thinks he has bronchitis based on how long he's had a runny nose, cough and that fever.  He prescribed Zithromax for him for 5 days and also a cough syrup to give him at bedtime.  I'm guessing that I have bronchitis too and prob gave it to Jackson - esp since we always drink after each other - I know, bad habit.  Anyway, yesterday Ryan came home from work early so I could go straight to bed for a few hours.  Sadly, last night I noticed Ethan was coughing a little, so I pray he doesn't get it too.  I feel a LOT better today- and will probably go to bed early again tonight just to really kick this crap!  I still have a deep yucky cough but I'm kind of getting used to it!  haha.  I was supposed to run 7 mi on Saturday - still haven't done that.  I'm so behind on my training schedule and this half marathon is approaching so fast.  I'm really really unprepared for it.  Just seems like everything worked against me, but I'm trying not to give up on it.  I may try to run today even though I really don't have the energy to do it.  I did finish a book that my mother-in-law gave me when I was pregnant with Jackson. I kept meaning to read it but finally started it a few months ago - yep, it took me a few months to get through a book!  It's called "Operating Instructions, A Journal of My Son's First Year" by Anne Lamont.  Really good book!  Makes me miss Jackson and Ethan as a baby-baby, so bad.

My baby boy.

 

My angel boy, growing up way too fast.

Jackson's Big Branson Adventure!

What a weekend!  My mom kept Ethan this weekend for us and let us give Jackson some one-on-one time with mom and dad.  He has been struggling lately with many new changes... His big boy bed back in May, then a new sibling to share everything with in July, then potty trained in November and finally his beloved paci broke this month.  He did pretty well til the last one... so we decided to give him some individual attention and fun!  So that's exactly what we did!  We left Saturday shortly after he woke up.  We went and saw "Rango" at the Branson IMAX.  Then we checked into the Welk Resort hotel and Jackson and Daddy played in the big water park inside the hotel.  After that, we ate a fun dinner at Shogun - where Jackson loved watching the chef make the food.  Then, we hit up a Glow In The Dark miniature golf course - probably Jackson's favorite thing to do!  After golf, we went and grabbed some ice cream and headed back to the hotel cuz our baby boy was SO sleepy... He almost didn't make it back to the hotel.  He barely argued with me as I helped him get curled up in bed.  We read a few stories and before we were done, Ryan was already asleep in the other bed.  It was 800p!  Unfortunately, both Jackson and I have pretty nasty coughs.  So while he coughed a lot through the night, I fought the urge to cough all night long so as to not wake him up.  He slept perfectly all night long!  I was SO SHOCKED!  He was a total angel!  He woke up at 630am and after breakfast, we drove to the Bass Pro Shops to look at the fish and then some shopping in Branson before heading back home!  I know he had a really good time but even Jackson was missing Ethan!  Mommy sure was!!!

Big Boy after his bath!

J loves Daddy's Nook!

Ready for Shogun!

J liked the chopsticks!

MINI GOLF!

Jackson wanted to sit on "Crush."

Ice Cream Makes A Boy Tired!

Silly Boy!

J got a big bed all to himself!

At Breakfast This Morning!

My WORLD!!

At Bass Pro Shops!

Jackson making his "Bear" Face.

Jackson, we cannot explain how much we love you.

They don't make 'em any cuter than this!

Happy 8 Months, my beautiful boy!  

You light up my world!

Today, I'm thankful for.... zzz's!

Yes, it's true!  Jackson was a total PRO last night!  We followed the same procedure for bedtime as last night and he seems very comfortable w/ me putting him to bed because "daddy is going to sleep."  That's the big trick to this whole thing... he has to truly believe Ryan is going to sleep.  So last night, as I tucked him in I told him "jackson, mommy is soooooooooo tired!" and I acted like I was going to fall asleep... and he goes "mommy, i tired too.  and daddy asleep now?"  I said yes and he said "we need to recharge our batteries!" (a phrase ryan taught him for going to sleep at night.... totally cute, i know.)  So then, he said our prayer and not another peep!!!!!  At 600am, he woke up and said he needed to go potty - so ryan ran up and let him go and then he asked "daddy is it wakeup time?" and ryan said no because the sun isn't out.  So then he said "ok daddy night night" and went back to sleep til 715am!  OMG!!!!  Night and Day difference!  I'm so thrilled!!!!!! Finally, a glimpse of hope that we can get back to where we used to be!

On another front, Ryan and I are battered up and broken.  He has been walking around with a VERY hurt and sore left shoulder and a badly fractured right thumb - from his ski accident.  He had x-rays and he's fine... but just in a lot of pain.  

Well, yesterday, I put the boys down for naps and went to get myself some lunch and realized my middle finger and the top and palm of my hand hurt really bad.  I didn't think much of it but as time went on, it started hurting and getting worse!  I have NO IDEA how I did this but the top of my hand is all swollen and I cannot lift my middle finger out to make it straight. The pain is mostly on my knuckle and inside the palm of my hand... so weird!  I tried taping it, icing it and taking IBU but nothing is really helping it.  Makes it very hard to pick up my baby... esp since I can't hardly change a diaper!  As long as my finger can stay rounded, i'm ok - like typing this... but i cannot squeeze anything in my hand or lay my hand flat on anything.  So weird.  

This is as far as I can lift my fingers up to make them flat.... 

 

Makes me aggravated, especially since I have no recollection of what I did!  I wonder if it's broken?  

I've never broken anything before, so I have no idea.  Silly me.

Night 17 of the Screaming Frenzies.

So last night, we put our new plan into action.  Ryan said good night to J from the playroom.... then he went downstairs to go to "sleep."  I played w/ J for a few minutes and then told him it's time for bed.  He didn't seem to mind too much - went in and did our normal routine.  After I tucked him in, I told him that daddy was already asleep and mommy was going down to sleep too.  He kept saying he needed a sip of water or milk (I told him we were out of lemonade - even though we aren't).  I told him we were out of those too.  I made him show me that he knows how to pull the covers up on his own - which he did fine.  Then, after our prayer - which we had to say twice - I started to leave and he started pleading with me. I just kept walking out saying "good night honey.  mommy loves you" and closed the door.  As SOON as I closed the door, he started screaming for me.  This went on for about 45 minutes.  Then he pulled the "gotta go pee pee" thing.  I went up, let him try - but he didn't go.  We accidentally lost track of time and he ended up drinking quite a bit at 700p - so I figured he DID need to go one more time.  I led him back to the bed and he wanted me to tuck him in.  I said no.  He can do it himself.  I gave him a kiss and as he was whaling at me - I closed the door.  This went on for another hour.  Finally, he screamed he needed to go potty again, so I went back up and this time he did go.  I bragged on him for being a big boy and keeping Thomas (his underwear) clean and dry.  He said "look mommy, i not crying anymore.  i happy now." so I said great job!  I reluctantly agreed to tuck him in but told him that it was the LAST TIME tonight I was going to do it.  He was ok w/ that and went right to sleep... until 1230am.  I heard him on the monitor start in and I just turned the monitor off rotate (it rotates between both kids - every 8 seconds it switches from one kid to the other) - and I just had it on Ethan, who was sleeping peacefully.  I heard him screaming - his room is right about ours.  But I was SO exhausted that I have no idea how long he did this.  Ryan said it was about 30 minutes.  I woke up (out of habit probably) at 330am and he was asleep in his bed.  He didn't wake again til 730am.  So we're going to just continue this plan til he realizes night time is for sleeping - not screaming.  At least I do feel like I got some sleep last night- and I feel SO much better today.  Of course, J woke up just as happy as can be.  I hope we've turned a corner.  I really love my sleep.  :)

Tired.

So last night was another doozy.  We were up SEVERAL times with Jackson - screaming his little head off.  He went to sleep ok around 815p. Then, it all started around 11p - just as Ryan and I finally fell asleep (I think we're overly tired or we would've been to sleep much sooner).  We let him go almost 45 minutes before going up and "tucking him in" which is what he was screaming for... Then, after that, we got settled back in bed and he started screaming again.  Ryan went up first and I just heard Jackson's screaming escalating so I went up.  We tried to reason with him - ha!  You cannot reason with this child when he's like that - he was frantic.  Everything we said just made him more and more mad and freak out even worse.  He just wouldn't calm down.  Finally after about 30 minutes of us both trying to calm him down - he settled down and went back to sleep - probably just from sheer exhaustion....At this point, it was after midnight. Then he did this again at 300am - this time screaming that he needed to go potty.  So Ry ran up and of course, he wouldn't even stop crying and screaming in order to pee.  So he never went.  Ry put him back in bed and finally he slept til 730am.  I am DONE with this.  It's officially been over 2 weeks that we've been dealing with this so this mommy is sick and tired of it.

New plan - which goes into effect tonight.  First, Jackson is cut off on any and all fluids after 530p - no exceptions.  In fact, it's going to be a big scene... because he's not going to like that at all.  I will tell him it's his LAST CHANCE to drink.  And that's it.  So no more pee-pee needs in the middle of the night.  Next, we're going to start getting ready for bed at 700p.  Daddy will leave and MOMMY will put Jackson to bed.  He has this weird attraction to his daddy and cannot say goodbye to him.  He gets so upset at the thought of not playing with Daddy anymore.  So Mommy will put both babies to bed - it's worth it to have some sleep.  I will do all the normal bedtime rituals with him.... brush teeth, PJ's, read a story, read a bible story, tuck in bed, prayer and I will explain, as sweet as I can, that mommy and daddy are going to sleep now.  We will not be coming back upstairs until the sun comes up.  That's it.  I will walk out and even if he's whaling when I leave, that's it.  Not going back up.  We have to break this vicious cycle and he needs to stop this habit of waking up screaming.  I told Ryan it may be another couple long nights because J is stubborn like his mommy - but I really believe that he's so smart - he will realize we aren't coming up and he will stop on his own.

For the last couple months, I have been planning a trip that we are supposed to take this weekend to Branson - just Mommy, Daddy and Jackson.  Ethan is staying w/ my mom for the weekend so she can get her baby fix and we could commit some time to just Jackson - a fun treat for him.  He's never stayed in a hotel before - so we wanted to test the waters a little.  Well, needless to say, I'm considering canceling that reservation.  I just can't have a frantically screaming child in a hotel room.  I don't know if that would mess him up even more.. I just don't know.  Part of me really thinks maybe giving J this one-on-one time will help, not hurt.  But I'm conflicted.  We'll see.

What makes me crazy about this whole thing - besides sleep deprivation - is that Jackson is an entirely different child all day long.  He is precious!  He's helpful and polite and sweet and SO happy.  He genuinely wants happiness all around him... whether it be ethan or mommy or daddy or the kitties... He's just wonderful.  My pride and joy.  And at night, he becomes this other creature entirely - this frantic, crazed child who seems completely out of it and not willing to settle down.  It's frustrating. Some people have called these "night terrors" but I don't know.  None of this happened before we "broke" the paci's.  I just think he doesn't know how to soothe himself back to sleep without the paci. He's having to "re-learn" to sleep. But maybe it is night terrors too... maybe his mind is running crazy since he doesn't seem to be really falling into that deep sleep. Who knows.

Thank God that we have only had one screaming child at a time.  Two nights ago, for the first time in forever, J slept pretty well and Ethan was up screaming.... We just can't catch a break on this sleep thing.  It's times like this that Ryan looks at me and says "you REALLY want another baby!?  Really!?"  I have to remind him that this is only temporary.... the benefits FAR outweigh the conflicts.  Hopefully, we can get some sleep soon...

Sleeping Woes

Sweet Jackson used to sleep 11-12 hours a night - without a peep while my baby was up every 4 hours crying.  Now, Ethan sleeps 12 hours straight and Jackson screams periodically all night.  Crazy.  TWO WEEKS of Jackson crying and screaming - literally only sleeping 3-4 hours at a stretch and then screaming for an hour or so.... it was awful.  On Day 13, I told Ryan to go upstairs and give that boy a paci.  We were just exhausted.  So he went upstairs, handed it to him and Jackson took it, put it in his mouth, yanked it out and gave it back to Ryan and said "no daddy - i not a baby! no paci!"  wow!  great job jackson!!!!!!  ryan came back down with a big smile on his face (it was midnight ) and told me the story.... I smiled too.  Then, 15 minutes later, Jackson started screaming again... and his screams were like this "mommy daddy it's wakeup time!  i need help!!  help me!  i need help with my covers! need lemonade!!!!! mommy!  daddy!  i crying!!!!!!!!  help!!!!!!  need a sip of lemonade!!! want to sleep with you!!!"  and this goes on and on and on and on and on!  It was getting progressively worse....


Finally, on Sunday night, we tried something new.  I gave him a tyke light.  I explained to him that if needed the light on, he can push the button and we would even call him "tyke."  We both laid him down for bed - he pleaded with us, like always, about this or that just to keep us from leaving the room.... finally, we all said good night....even saying good night to Spencer, the train AND tyke, the nightlight.  About 5 minutes later, he started screaming for us - lemonade and covers and needing another bible story and not sleepy and on and on.... SO - we decided to intercom him and tell him we were sleeping.  So I did it and I told him daddy was already asleep and mommy was going to sleep too.  So I let him go... he whaled and whaled - as loud as he could.  This went on from 845p - 1005p.  Finally, I heard him say "gotta go pee pee!!" so that can't be ignored!  So I went up - let him pee - gave him an m&m (just to calm him down) and tucked him in again and said good night and told him mommy was going back to sleep.  He cried for about 5 more minutes and by 1015p - he was out.  And quiet the WHOLE night! o-M-g!!!!!!!!!!! 
3/22: Last night - J only woke once!  He yelled for daddy saying he needed help getting his covers pulled up - so Ry ran up and did it and he went right back to sleep til 745am!  So basically he slept 830p - 745am!  That's my boy!  However, Ethan was up screaming last night - so Ry and I have decided sleep is just not on the radar for us.  Ethan was screaming like his ear drum burst just like last time - even though we just took him in yesterday and the ENT said his ears are not infected.... but that he is badly teething.  I don't know.... I definitely think my tiny man was in some serious pain from "something" last night... and definitely seemed like it was his ears.  Hopefully someday soon, we can get both our boys feeling better and sleeping better... I feel like a mom of a newborn all over again!!!!!!!

Mason's 3 Years Old!

On Sunday, we headed over to Kingston to celebrate my cousin Linsey's baby boy's 3rd birthday!  We had been telling J for days that he was going to get to go see Mason at his house and give him his birthday present and see his brand new train table!  Well, that was right up J's alley!  Jackson had SO MUCH fun!  I hope we can make it over there more often now that the weather is nicer!

 

Even Grandma Betty joined in on the fun!

 Mason got lots of Thomas stuff!

 And some goggles for his new weed eater!

 Grandma and her 7th great grand baby!

 Jackson wanted to go blow bubbles out to the cows!

 He loved the playset!

 Isn't he a cutie?  Doesn't look at all like a child who hasn't been sleeping at night!

 Jackson and Aunt Janet!

 Ethan and Linsey

 J got tackled by the dog!  He loved every second of it!  :-)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MASON LANE!  :)